My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
