Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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