do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
