"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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