is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
