you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
