i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
