I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I have tasted many bathrooms
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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