You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
