I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
