Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
