So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize