OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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