you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
