bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
