At least make sure they are 18
Why
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
