on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
All the doctor said was why
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
how does that bad decision feel?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
