the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
