You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Randomize
