it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
