I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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