They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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