That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
