I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
