You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
