They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
