i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
