I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
