Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
