just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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