i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
