you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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