He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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