Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Randomize
