Me too!
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
