I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
