From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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