so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
