Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
soo... how was my night?
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