Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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