I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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