I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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