I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
