Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
