I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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