i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
