Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
MIDGETS
????
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
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