i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
