What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
