Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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